LEAVE AND CLEAVE” Genesis 2: 21-25 10.16.12
Upon consulting Webster’s Dictionary for the word “cleave,” you
will find it to have two distinctly different meanings. The first is a
transitive verb, cleave, cleft, clove, meaning to adhere; to be attached
strongly. The second is an Intransitive verb, cleave, clave, cleaved,
meaning to divide with violence; part naturally. Literally, we could
have named this post, "Cleave, Cleave, and Cleave, since we are con-
sidering the state of matrimony as it should be and marriage as prac-
ticed in our post modern era. The confusion in the title would be no
less than is the confusion in marriage today. In the interest of clea-
ring up the confusion, we will leave the title alone and consult the
only reliable source.
(The only authoritative source concerning any materially important
matter, and the only guide to the definition and practice of marriage).
Today it seems ideas about marriage follow the TV soap opera model
as follows: Two young people meet, fall “madly” in love and move in
together. They may or may not get married. It is also of note; early
on, the relationship seems great; whether they get married or not.
The glow is lost and each moves on to another equally unsatisfactory
relationship. There seem to be few working models of husband/wife,
father/mother roles worth following. There is one trustworthy source
for information on marriage, and it is God’s Word. The Lord God crea-
ted His universe from nothing, created man and woman, from dust,
then instituted marriage. He is our source for information on crea-
tion and marriage. In Genesis 2: 21-25, we see basics on marriage.
In verse 24, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and
be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” The narrative
goes: The Lord God knew it was not good for man to be alone; he
needed someone along side. So He created man from the dust of the
earth, and made woman from one of the man's ribs. He then brought
the woman to the man. The man, Adam, said, “This is now bone of
my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called woman, because
she was taken out of man.”
The key here is still “cleave.” The woman was actually cleft from
man's side, then clave to him. Our story, has to do with the leaving
happening prior to the cleaving of the man and woman. When a man
and woman do not properly leave parents or others, prior to the clea-
ving, there is no proper marriage. In this case, the spouse who does
not leave is not committed fully committed to the marriage and the
marriage is temporary or at best weak.
Obviously, many problems besetting families today would be avoi-
ded with the understanding of this principle. Each marriage partner
must come into the new relationship, aware this is a completely new
entity and what was before is past. If they have the mentality of,
“You and I against the world,” the marriage has a good chance. Each
partner must recognize dependence to be mutually exclusive. Looking
to other sources for comfort, assistance or confidence is a betrayal of
that covenant.
Let’s suppose the woman goes to her parents to complain about a
perceived grievance with her husband. Naturally, the parents “side”
with their child and betrayal grows. The husband, learning of minor
“betrayals,” returns to a friend, male or female, and seeks some com-
fort or advice. This does nothing, but further complicate the situation.
The more persons involved, the less likely the marriage is able to sur-
vive, much less prosper. ( A brief parenthesis:) If a marriage relation-
ship has deteriorated to the point of separation or divorce, there may
come a time when the partners do not communicate. If and when it
comes, a third party who is Spiritual and wise about the marriage rela-
tionship may be asked for counsel. This should be regarded as a last
resort. If any relationship between two individuals is to be healthy or
last, the participants in that relationship always considers the other
prior to making decisions or engaging in any activity that might be
harmful to that relationship. There is no place for a self-centered,
or "me first” attitude in a relationship if it is to last.
We have not even considered moral betrayal and will not. That is
a problem of character for the subjects involved an d does not have to
do with the education of partners about marriage, itself. One thing we
might do, is ask before any act; “Would I approve of my spouse enga-
ging in this behavior, or would my spouse approve if I engaged in this
activity?” The Advice, aside from that is to say; a person considering
marriage must be sure of the character of a prospective spouse before
entering into such a contract. Take as much time and effort as needed
to be convinced of the maturity and morality of a prospective spouse.
It's that important. Persons in a hurry to marry, usually make tragic
mistakes with bitter, lifelong consequences.
In the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church at Ephesus, we find defini-
tive treatment of marriage as it relates to the concept of the Church of
Jesus Christ. In verse 22, often quoted to wives, it states, “Wives, sub-
mit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” The directive is true, but
there are other factors sometimes overlooked, from the same passage.
In the verse preceding is this thought, “...submitting to one another in
the fear of God.” We see this; the submission is not a one way street,
but applies to the whole family of God as we love and submit to each
other within the fellowship of the local church. In verse 25 and follo-
wing we find this advice and this admonition. “Husbands, love your
wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, that
He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the
word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, without
spot, wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and with-
out blemish. Then in verse 31 he, Paul, quotes part of our prior text
from the book of Genesis on leaving and cleaving. In verses 32-33 he
gives the key. “This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ
and the church. Nevertheless, let each one of you in particular so love
his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her hus-
band. (KJV has it "reverence")
In this Scripture passage, we find the marital union between a man
and a woman to be a valid and important part of life. It is a picture
of God and His church, an earthly example displaying truth about His
Kingdom. Mankind was created as the companion for eternity of a
Holy God. Some places gives "God" as plural. This is a mystery;
since the church is also plural, the simile is consistent. Mankind is
plural, body, soul and spirit. God is plural, Father, Son and Spirit,
one God. The other factor that comes to mind is the reason the Lord
created mankind, was to provide for himself a bride and friend for-
ever drawn from that creation. There is to be a process of sanctifi-
cation, (separation from the "world,") of this bride, after which the
Lord will take His church to be his bride, just as a woman separates
herself from other relationships before marriage. (leave and cleave)
Today, there are those who have a problem with “submission" as
a necessary concept in marriage. Taking the Scripture as a whole,
throw in the factor of unconditional love of the man for the woman,
(..as Christ loved the church and gave Himself...) We see a woman is
going to have little difficulty submitting to a man who is already sub-
mitted to her and is willing to live and give his life for her. Jesus
Christ the example, laid down His life for His church or bride and He
expects no less from a husband within the marriage covenant. When
Scripture directs a woman to submit to her husband, God's Word
has also directed the man to love his wife enough to die for her. This
earthly covenant displays a heavenly message. When the husband
loves his wife enough to die for her, he is a living example of Jesus
Christ. If he fails this test, he is a poor reflection on Jesus Christ.
When a woman submits to her husband and respect him, she is an
example of what the Church of Jesus Christ is to be. If she fails to
submit or respect her husband, she reflects poorly on the Church of
Jesus Christ and along with the husband who does not love his wife
unconditionally, must stand before the lord at the Judgment Seat, of
Christ and give an account for this failure. (sin)
What excuse will stand up to the question; “How did your marriage
reflect on Jesus Christ and His Church?” How will you or I respond
to this all-important question?
donporter,sr 10.16.12 edited 11.22.14, 5.16.17
http://biblicalclarity-don.blogspot.com/2012/12/more-on-marriage.html

Upon consulting Webster’s Dictionary for the word “cleave,” you
will find it to have two distinctly different meanings. The first is a
transitive verb, cleave, cleft, clove, meaning to adhere; to be attached
strongly. The second is an Intransitive verb, cleave, clave, cleaved,
meaning to divide with violence; part naturally. Literally, we could
have named this post, "Cleave, Cleave, and Cleave, since we are con-
sidering the state of matrimony as it should be and marriage as prac-
ticed in our post modern era. The confusion in the title would be no
less than is the confusion in marriage today. In the interest of clea-
ring up the confusion, we will leave the title alone and consult the
only reliable source.
(The only authoritative source concerning any materially important
matter, and the only guide to the definition and practice of marriage).
Today it seems ideas about marriage follow the TV soap opera model
as follows: Two young people meet, fall “madly” in love and move in
together. They may or may not get married. It is also of note; early
on, the relationship seems great; whether they get married or not.
The glow is lost and each moves on to another equally unsatisfactory
relationship. There seem to be few working models of husband/wife,
father/mother roles worth following. There is one trustworthy source
for information on marriage, and it is God’s Word. The Lord God crea-
ted His universe from nothing, created man and woman, from dust,
then instituted marriage. He is our source for information on crea-
tion and marriage. In Genesis 2: 21-25, we see basics on marriage.
In verse 24, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and
be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” The narrative
goes: The Lord God knew it was not good for man to be alone; he
needed someone along side. So He created man from the dust of the
earth, and made woman from one of the man's ribs. He then brought
the woman to the man. The man, Adam, said, “This is now bone of
my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called woman, because
she was taken out of man.”
The key here is still “cleave.” The woman was actually cleft from
man's side, then clave to him. Our story, has to do with the leaving
happening prior to the cleaving of the man and woman. When a man
and woman do not properly leave parents or others, prior to the clea-
ving, there is no proper marriage. In this case, the spouse who does
not leave is not committed fully committed to the marriage and the
marriage is temporary or at best weak.
Obviously, many problems besetting families today would be avoi-
ded with the understanding of this principle. Each marriage partner
must come into the new relationship, aware this is a completely new
entity and what was before is past. If they have the mentality of,
“You and I against the world,” the marriage has a good chance. Each
partner must recognize dependence to be mutually exclusive. Looking
to other sources for comfort, assistance or confidence is a betrayal of
that covenant.
Let’s suppose the woman goes to her parents to complain about a
perceived grievance with her husband. Naturally, the parents “side”
with their child and betrayal grows. The husband, learning of minor
“betrayals,” returns to a friend, male or female, and seeks some com-
fort or advice. This does nothing, but further complicate the situation.
The more persons involved, the less likely the marriage is able to sur-
vive, much less prosper. ( A brief parenthesis:) If a marriage relation-
ship has deteriorated to the point of separation or divorce, there may
come a time when the partners do not communicate. If and when it
comes, a third party who is Spiritual and wise about the marriage rela-
tionship may be asked for counsel. This should be regarded as a last
resort. If any relationship between two individuals is to be healthy or
last, the participants in that relationship always considers the other
prior to making decisions or engaging in any activity that might be
harmful to that relationship. There is no place for a self-centered,
or "me first” attitude in a relationship if it is to last.
We have not even considered moral betrayal and will not. That is
a problem of character for the subjects involved an d does not have to
do with the education of partners about marriage, itself. One thing we
might do, is ask before any act; “Would I approve of my spouse enga-
ging in this behavior, or would my spouse approve if I engaged in this
activity?” The Advice, aside from that is to say; a person considering
marriage must be sure of the character of a prospective spouse before
entering into such a contract. Take as much time and effort as needed
to be convinced of the maturity and morality of a prospective spouse.
It's that important. Persons in a hurry to marry, usually make tragic
mistakes with bitter, lifelong consequences.
In the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church at Ephesus, we find defini-
tive treatment of marriage as it relates to the concept of the Church of
Jesus Christ. In verse 22, often quoted to wives, it states, “Wives, sub-
mit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” The directive is true, but
there are other factors sometimes overlooked, from the same passage.
In the verse preceding is this thought, “...submitting to one another in
the fear of God.” We see this; the submission is not a one way street,
but applies to the whole family of God as we love and submit to each
other within the fellowship of the local church. In verse 25 and follo-
wing we find this advice and this admonition. “Husbands, love your
wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, that
He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the
word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, without
spot, wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and with-
out blemish. Then in verse 31 he, Paul, quotes part of our prior text
from the book of Genesis on leaving and cleaving. In verses 32-33 he
gives the key. “This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ
and the church. Nevertheless, let each one of you in particular so love
his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her hus-
band. (KJV has it "reverence")
In this Scripture passage, we find the marital union between a man
and a woman to be a valid and important part of life. It is a picture
of God and His church, an earthly example displaying truth about His
Kingdom. Mankind was created as the companion for eternity of a
Holy God. Some places gives "God" as plural. This is a mystery;
since the church is also plural, the simile is consistent. Mankind is
plural, body, soul and spirit. God is plural, Father, Son and Spirit,
one God. The other factor that comes to mind is the reason the Lord
created mankind, was to provide for himself a bride and friend for-
ever drawn from that creation. There is to be a process of sanctifi-
cation, (separation from the "world,") of this bride, after which the
Lord will take His church to be his bride, just as a woman separates
herself from other relationships before marriage. (leave and cleave)
Today, there are those who have a problem with “submission" as
a necessary concept in marriage. Taking the Scripture as a whole,
throw in the factor of unconditional love of the man for the woman,
(..as Christ loved the church and gave Himself...) We see a woman is
going to have little difficulty submitting to a man who is already sub-
mitted to her and is willing to live and give his life for her. Jesus
Christ the example, laid down His life for His church or bride and He
expects no less from a husband within the marriage covenant. When
Scripture directs a woman to submit to her husband, God's Word
has also directed the man to love his wife enough to die for her. This
earthly covenant displays a heavenly message. When the husband
loves his wife enough to die for her, he is a living example of Jesus
Christ. If he fails this test, he is a poor reflection on Jesus Christ.
When a woman submits to her husband and respect him, she is an
example of what the Church of Jesus Christ is to be. If she fails to
submit or respect her husband, she reflects poorly on the Church of
Jesus Christ and along with the husband who does not love his wife
unconditionally, must stand before the lord at the Judgment Seat, of
Christ and give an account for this failure. (sin)
What excuse will stand up to the question; “How did your marriage
reflect on Jesus Christ and His Church?” How will you or I respond
to this all-important question?
donporter,sr 10.16.12 edited 11.22.14, 5.16.17
http://biblicalclarity-don.blogspot.com/2012/12/more-on-marriage.html

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