WORKING WITH TEENS

WORKING WITH TEENS:     Ecclesiastes 21: 1              June 10, 2004

                "Remember now thy creator in the days of thy youth..."

TEENS ARE BRIGHT AND ALERT: Youth in a given setting can learn 
and do anything worthy of them, if well motivated.  Proper motivation 
is leadership appealing to their best nature, show them a good reason, 
give a  clear  vision or  direction to  stated goals.  If  there  is a stated 
goal it will be reached.  If there is no goal they will reach that.

GENERALLY, TEENS WILL DO MUCH AS EXPECTED:  In order 
to appeal to a younger generation,  we  must always hold the standard 
high, expecting them to achieve.  There is absolutely no reason for lea-
dership to believe any teen would get excited about business as usual  
or  mundane, trivial activities.

DO WE EXPECT ANY GROUP TO EXCEED GOALS OF LEADERS?
One killer of motivation in teenagers is when those in charge fail to 
hold high personal standards or inferior leadership is assigned the 
group. The Persons working  with our  teens must be  the brightest 
and most Spiritual among us.  Do not turn our teens over to leader-
ship near their same age and/or level of maturity.

PERSPECTIVE;  IMMATURITY WILL SURFACE:
     We  must never  be surprised when teenagers act like kids. We  
must expect this, honor it and  never punish one for simply acting 
immaturely.  After  all,  they are works  in progress, as are we all.   
A leader must not let these episodes, and they are just that, side-
track the group from the achieving of a goal.  Teens are not minia-
ture adults and should not be expected to act as such.  A wise lea-
der will be prepared for such events.  (Most adults are not all that 
mature in beharior.)   If  there is one who is constantly disruptive, 
this  can,  usually be  handled by firm,  discrete,   private sessions 
outside of  group activities.  We  must always  remember our own
years as immature, disruptive pranksters.    

TEENS LOVE TO SHOCK US:
It is unusual in a group of any size for there not to be one who says 
things in the group or to leadership for shock value.  The statement 
may or may not be true and is rarely 100% accurate.  We  can take 
such  incidents  in stride,  handling them  discretely with the indivi-
dual.  Make a  rule of  thumb to never  embarrass anyone,  except 
yourself.  They love that.

BALANCING THE RELATIONSHIP OF TEENS AND PARENTS: 
Never  let those in our charge get the impression that persons in lea-
dership reveal everything that happens within the circle of youth acti-
vities to their parents.  There will be times when youth workers have  
frank  discussions with  parents.  Teens need not feel  threatened by 
such hanging over  their  heads as a threat and do  not need  to know  
when  parents  are consulted.

WE MUST NOT BREAK  FAITH WITH OUR CHARGES:  Leaders 
working with youth must have judgment sound enough to know how 
to  handle  confidences  teens share.   Most of   these  must  be kept 
strictly confidential.   If there are legal questions, hazardous or risky 
behavior,  each  incident must  be handled  with discretion  and love.   
Always begin by attempts to persuade  the youth to  confide in  their 
parents  before taking unilateral  action.  Since confidentiality is not 
legally protected;  you must take wise action with love.

FAST PACED, MEANINGFUL ACTIVITY:  Nothing can  take the 
place of  planning and  preparation for a meaningful activity.  Moving  
from one one activity to another must be done in an organized fashion 
and “down time” brief. Teenagers do  not mark time very well, as this
will probably cause  one of  those lapses into  immature behavior and
there  is  no one to hold responsible but poorly organized leadership.

CONCLUSION:   Love all  your charges  equally,  but be prepared  to
respond  to each as an individual.  There are no two alike in any pre-
dictable  sense.   Try not to act too shocked no  matter what one says,  
and remember,  these  principles probably apply in  a large degree to  
adults as well; they are largely  responsible  for the behavior of  their
 kids.

donporter 10.03.12, edited 11.14.14, 8.15.16, 5.29.17